


someone like you

by comradekeith



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: ???? i literally have no idea how to tag this, Crack, F/M, Good guy Lotor, Hurt/Comfort, Other, bbhJHJKKJ ITS REALLY DISTURBING OK, cowtaur kaltenecker, headleg shiro, im just. gonna leave this now, kaltenecker and shiro have Really Long Necks, mentioned kaltenecker/lotor, nipple mentions, weird analogies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2017-12-12
Packaged: 2019-02-13 23:51:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12995238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/comradekeith/pseuds/comradekeith
Summary: "Don't leave."His voice broke slightly, tears beginning to gather in his eyes. She looked back at him, his big eyes gentle and warm. She was calm and sympathetic: she knew he loved her.





	someone like you

"Don't leave."

His voice broke slightly, tears beginning to gather in his eyes. She looked back at him, his big eyes gentle and warm. She was calm and sympathetic, she knew he loved her. He had known this day would come. Ever since Shiro entered her life, he'd known this exact moment would happen. Shiro had swept her of her trotters with his glowing personality and exceeding charm. Lotor had no chance against him. 

It's not like Lotor and Kaltenecker had been a thing, really. Sure, they went on some dates and they had kissed, they made out, they had made out a lot. But she didn't love him like he loved her. Lotor only had eyes for her, for her honey-smooth voice, her hairy lips and snotty nostrils, her graceful and strong body, her knobbly long legs and the flawless trotters. The way her tail flicked while chasing away the flies wanting to crawl up her asshole or lay eggs in her eyes. The way the sun reflected on her fur-covered armless torso.

She was beautiful.

And she was kind, and caring, and she had been there for him when no one else had. But now, she stood in front of him, with Shiro waiting behind her. Ready to leave Lotor. Lotor tilted his head back to meet her brown big eyeballs. 

"Are you just going to leave me, Kal?" cried Lotor, tears rolling down his cheeks. Kaltenecker swung her head softly, looking back to Shiro where he stood, waiting. The last sunlight of the day shone on the helmet on his very big out-of-proportion head. His huge biceps rested against his muscular pillowy pecs, his one-decimeter long forearms crossed, his fishnet-clad legs steady on the ground despite the red high heels he wore. Shiro noticed Kaltenecker looking at him and met her gaze lovingly.

Because she was a cow, she couldn't exactly smile. But Lotor noticed the joy in her body language and her eyes, and while he felt his heart break into a quazillion pieces, he found solace in the fact that she at least would be happy.

"Kal," he sobbed. "I love you, but I understand." 

Kaltenecker moo'ed with the softest of voices, since she was a cow. Communication had always been the major problem in their relationship. 

Shiro screeched his mating call, which sounded like what you would imagine a cross between a peacock and a velociraptor would sound like. His chest puffed up, as if he had swallowed a giant balloon which now got filled with air. His perky nipples erected, becoming even longer than they had been previously. He began to step-dance, his tiny arms rotating like propellar blades do.  
Lotor watched, heartbroken, as Kaltenecker began to join in the dance, her rubberlike spine thrashing wildly to the beat of Shiro's heels slopping in the mud. The two udders hanging from her chest bounced, her eight sausage-like cownipples reaching out towards Shiro in passionate desire. 

They had accepted each other as lifemates. 

Lotor wept while beatboxing a sad tune. He watched them stepdance, watched as they bumped their very long necks together with affection. Kaltenecker moo'ed like a cow, because she was a cowtaur with cowy vocal chords, and that moo was nothing like the moo's she'd been using with Lotor. It was soft and croony, like a bass singer in a russian choir had turned into a turkey who talked in slow-motion.

And even though they were busy in their matechoosing ritual, Kaltenecker heard him cry.  She broke away from Shiro, trotted over to Lotor and bent her back like a slinky to bump her foreheard against his. Her sharp horns gently stabbed him in the temples, but he didn't mind.

"It's okay. We'll still be friends, right?" he whispered whispery. Kaltenecker purred and nodded.

"I love you," said Lotor. Kaltenecker gave him a pitying expression, throwing a glance sideways. "No, wait," Lotor continued. "Just let me talk, okay?" He stared into Kaltenecker's eyes. 

"Even if I'm in love with you, I am happy for you. You deserve this. I will get over this, you don't have to worry about me. I am happy that you are happy, and it doesn't matter if it's with him or with me, or with anyone else."

Kaltenecker moo'ed low in her throat, that special moo she had saved for only Lotor, the 'I love you, you are my best friend'-moo. She raised her head again, standing tall above Lotor and, oh quiznak, she was magnificent. She put her weight on her hind legs and put her trotters on Lotor's shoulders, bending her long torso over his left shoulder to rest her nuzzle against the small of his back. The warmth of her cowtiddies against his shoulderblades made him feel safe, and he realised that he was okay with this.

Lotor hugged her back, cheek resting against her pulsing heart. He squeezed her and then let her go. Kaltenecker came back to all fours and did her best to smile - she just opened her mouth as wide as she could -, showing all of her flat grasseating teeth. Lotor returned the kind-of-a-smile, his eye sweat long forgotten. He waved her away, and she turned to walk back to her waiting Shiro. She stopped after one step, turned back to Lotor, and threw herself at him. With her raspy, moist tounge, she licked a stripe over his face, leaving saliva and snot dripping down Lotor's eyebrows, nose, and chin. He giggled and pushed her away playfully. Kaltenecker stuck her tounge tip up her nostril, satisfied. He pushed her gently.

"Go, you fucking shitshaker. Go with your beloved." They kind-of-smiled at each other, and Kaltenecker tilted her head back to moo loudly, almost like a roar. She twisted her body and set away in a canter, towards Shiro who had fallen asleep, his head resting against his bellybutton. He jolted awake when Kaltenecker bumped into him, his long neck snapping back and hitting her in the under-udder. He cackled like a chicken, looked towards Lotor and waved happily. Lotor waved back.

Lotor watched as Shiro got down on all fours, scraping the muddy earth with his high heels and clawlike nails. His tounge lolled out of his mouth and flapped up and down like a trampoline while Kaltenecker chirped beside him . They stopped for a second to boop their noses together. Then they set off into a run, Kaltenecker cantering over the green fields with Shiro on her side, running as fast and as smooth as a cheetah.

As he saw them run away with each other under the setting sun, Lotor exhaled a mourning but content sigh. He'd be okay. Most importantly, she would be happy.

And that was enough for Lotor.

**Author's Note:**

> no regrets.
> 
>  
> 
> [hit me up on tumblr lads](https://kristmaskeith.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> [based on this convo i had with @katanakeith](http://katanakeith.tumblr.com/post/168273720656/kristmaskeith-katanakeith-katanakeith)
> 
>  
> 
> yeah thanks to [ kye](http://katanakeith.tumblr.com/) and [nico](https://klanceisviolet.tumblr.com/) for supporting me through this jbdjfsbjk


End file.
